Insomnia

some people can be so blind. or just plain stupid. or both. and mixing up with everything that sores the heart. with my heart condition, what can you possibly do. not much. barely nothing at all. its already weak, and now its more unable than ever to do its duty for a living. i have never felt this way before. this feeling of forgiving the sinners. yet i did anyway. my companions despises me for my act. but i just couldnt help myself. i cant help it if someone is feeling uneasy or even a certain tingle of dislike to a matter that involves me. or if they feel guilty for doing something wrong to me. i dont like to let them dwell in their guilt. its a terrible feeling. its barbaric. and how do i know that? cause i have been through those kind of phases before. and have swore not to let other people around me or just any of my acquaintance to go through them. i believe in peace for better place in world that starts with just one being.

love segment : to my crush that i had continuing till now since 3 years ago. i still do. i never gave up on you. but i just cant speak it out from this trembling lips that had never been touched. u caught my whole attention since the first time i saw you. though im pretty sure you'll never find out that i have been having this stupid feeling for you.

close too far : my parents and young monsters left for up north. for the first time they left without me. and for the first time, i earned this horrible feeling. somethings missing. and i cant tell what it is. yet all i know is that, i miss them very much, and im nothing without them. life sucks without them.everything just doesnt work out well without them around. and i feel stupid for just realising it now after all this years. gosh, im crying this very second.

tremble pulse, depressants, pills : when will this stop? please stop right now. why cant i sleep? please knock me on the head, let me rest for once with peace.

and so then, she took pills that'll treat cold flu as they'll make her feel drowsy, but it fails. s she took some more in, till half the bottle is in herself.