I'm Not Saying Goodbye

at first when i woke up today on the 17th, i was contented (well yeah aside that i'm seriously ill until i open fast before time..) because i'll get to send mommy to the airport for her umrah. i was like the first one to shower and  get ready.. bathe my sister and all. then before we left the house, my granddaddy 'azan'ed. and grandmommy started crying while we said our prayers. Arrival at the departure was amazing, it feels good to be at the airport again, you see lots of all people crying as their loved ones depart/arrive.. you see people screaming, or couples giving last kiss(haha okay i exagerrated at the last part, there wasnt any couple doing PDA's) but yeah, some people loves airports to death, some people hates em like shit. While i myself, neutral? i do love it but sometimes i dont quite like the feeling its taking my mom away. (HEY SHE'S COMING BACK!) right.. 

then came the time, my mom's departure time was 1530, and it was like and hour before that time, she and Mak Su and Abg Ijai and friends had to go in by the waiting room one step to all aboard. so everyone salam'ed eachother. mom hugged tok and they both started crying, then mom hugged Razak, Malik, Kahar, Hakim, Humairah.. then she wander looking for something til some time mom realised she havent hugged me. Told me to be good with everyone, cook well, jaga adik and all. She was saying that with her tear melody and suddenly i popped out waters too. -.-" was planning not to cry.. but everybody was.. so wth. 

Then by the elevator, the gap between Mom and us.. dad's turn to hug mom. she was whispering so i couldnt hear anything. she was still crying though. dad kept on wearing that hold-the-heartbreak-in smile. then as she step down to the elevator Kenangan Terindah song suddenly played at the KLIA stereo, good timing -.- feeling it. down the elevator, dad said to mom 'Come Back To Us, yeah'. 'InsyaAllah' mom replied him. i can sense the meaning was deep. i turned to look at dad, the first time i witnessed his heartbreaking + hopeful expression, i was screaming tears inside. Watching mom entering the check in for afar, hakim and humairah cried out sadly, calling mom again and again. Mom was out of sight, i carried Humairah in my arms.. and head to the fast tear wipe room, the toilet. then we got in the car, head to the cargo department, hoping we could see mom fly off from there :P now i'm like taking over her part at home and family, for my little siblings and everybody else. I havent practice cooking! i better go and get a rev start! 

everyones being strong for her now, the best we could do for her. 

we love you mother.

forever and ever babe.