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Dont come any nearer, the steps that you take, the further inches against gravity pushes the litres through my skin. Lie on me now, you dont need to say what i want to hear, i just want you to be more at ease. though i doubt this situation, its growing more sensitive. Heck, you just dont care anymore. So walk on my dear, i dare you not, to look back at me and consider the sympathy. You really dont have to patch up the wounds, you dont have the hands to heal me. Not anymore. And please for the love of God, leave this shit behind and dont pretend that you care. I dont need this to wind up around my face. Bull your sufferness. its all a lie. if it wasnt, you wont keep hurting me, i was fighting fate to keep this between us alright, thank you for all the tiny effort of alls ruined. Wow me, its you who's suffering, you alone.. yea yea so ive been told every second. Didnt think i did. Well hear me out, people are different, their ways of living, you know that smartster i dont have to waste my time giving this, but i too felt it. The days that i went, only i know the feeling, the love or the miserable. I pray you have a good life so dont swear on mine. I dont want to lose you, but if its too hard for you to take in that fact, leave it be. We'll survive. Losts where i'll learn a way of life. All my life it will take, it doesnt matter. Through tough chapters, just defines this life. So please, dont make me hate you. i dont want to hate you.

IMYSDM

i miss them ;( raya hols is up, so means i cant see this monkey faces for a week. hope theres open house soon, get together and do the things we do best! ;P see you guys soon.

o and, i miss my dance buds too ;( rehearsals.. when oh when?

o well,
siti Sturgess

WHOA whoa WHOA

MOMS BACKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!! haha youkatta ne!!!!!! aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!! happy happy happy!! like omg i could rlly go bungee jumping right now still doesnt fill the happiness that i felt! wee! rollercoaster ride babyyy! oh, poor daddy last nite he worked like super hard, painting the wall and fixing the curtain rails all by himself. he didnt sleep worked out all his energy on the room, i tried to help a lil here and there. then i only slept around 3 to 4 am, ( i didnt want to sleep at all actually, but i was getting sick, so i gulped a bottle of cold meds, you know what it'll do to you..) so then, woke up at 9 something, i shouted to dad who was sleeping,( he probly just slept like a minute ago) and he stumbled out of the bed straight to the wash machine and to his car. while i ws still in be with my sister and hakim, we heard the car engine went out the gate til it was not heard anymore. hakim was like 'Yes!' and i high fived him.
then we quickly bathe and all, did finishing touches to the new 'mama's room'. and sat downstairs in eagerness and excitement in waiting for the Queen's return. while then, watched ttly spies, keroro(it was really funny) and omg HOLIC! i finally got to watch it, but t wasnt that good, manga's better. then hakim shouted 'MAMA! MAMA DAH BALIK!' me and mairah ran to the door and saw mom in white, in the car, smiling at us. me hakim and mairah marble eyed watching her, as though guy sebastian was singing ANGELS BROUGHT ME HERE. greeted her with the best hugs in the world. and she went on all about her umrah, nonstop train session with her mother, Tok. she lost a few kg's, dad was excited about it. lol. haha. and then she unpacked, my favourite part.. haha XD. got me the jubah i wanted, i decided to share with mom. then a sack of the worlds best chocolates! humairah got a zikir camel, its so cute!! gahahaa. basically everyone got a lil something. but we're all just glad that she's home. then, i roam around the fridge, gawking at the chocs, though i think i heard one of the choc said 'Get a life already!' yeeeeh. (wth?) then mom came to the kitchen with dad behind her, dad was holding a parfume box, ANNA SUI, SUI LOVE. he said, 'this is yours, nah' i was like denying noo la, probly mom want to give someone else- then mom clarified its mine. !!!!!!! i almost teared! i hugged mom again. my first ori parfume. :D hoaaa...

then mum finally went up to the bedroom, and she was shocked plus happy of the new look, dad and i was pleased by that. a lot of effort has chipped in. and finally, dad got his nap. mom busy unpacking. humairah endless play with her new princess cosmetic box, hakim over his bounce baseball, and me? a cramp cheekbone. smiling all the way, my lady ;)

...

Yesterday, emotionalised. my brain didnt do its job so the heart took over. One more day till mom gets back. Meaning the next day will be hectic. School was fun, (i guess thats a once in a ifetime) everyone was excited, the last day til the raya break, 'what colour is your baju raya?' was going on all around school, even the janitors. me and my friends was jumping upside down, raya raya raya. and the last period of school's bell rang, and soon after that hari raya song was played. i had goosebumps! (.. that reminded me of something) and yeah, then i had to stayback after school. had to practice for Malam Graduasi performance. burn new song for the dance 'You Cant Stop The Beat by Hairspray', alhamdulillah i could finish choreographing it before went off. very tiring though. yea yea i didnt puasa but still :) and then right after school, had to accompany dad, bought curtains and quilts, and i teman mairah ate at the restaurant, dad insisted me to eat too, ( in public during puasa, yasin reading will be followed right after i could start praying) and so at night, on the way to tuition, aunty farah texted me, there i sat, thinking it was call for me to the next day, rehearse.. or something.. but then, the show got canceled. i couldnt look up.
before i slept, was thinking too much, and most of tears too, woke up with vampires eyes. started the day nice and easy, planning distractions. So i thought i should bake some brownies, but the result was not that wow. Yes inka, you are a baking goddess. couldnt find a proper cake tin, but a small one. so i had to bake em using the same cake tin over and over again. exhausted already. yet an interesting thing to do, makes me feel a pinch of joy. then i went to daddy, and he was devastated, the tailor adjusted the curtain wrongly, so i offered help with it. yeah, i sewed the curtain, 3 sets. at the same time, i was babysitting humairah and hakim too, the twirps cant seem to stop fighting, i'm losing my voice. then had to rush to Grandmama's place for buka puasa and met my cousins. and here now i'm at home writing you. and how wow i'm tired. here i should stop, and here i'm counting the hours, my mom to be at the doorstep. i can never replace you Mother, how thankful i am now.

A Star, Not So Bright

living now, as beats starts to pump in and out, taking promises out of pure hearts, making wild goose chase everywhere around this chaos garden. placing faith and trust to a figure, not knowing the consequence thatll trigger later. having expectations so vertical, yet all you can hold is deeper than the wide sea bed. this hope has trashed away. the way you make me feel has gone running marathons and will never look back and consider defeat. run for your goal, go on. i will just stand from the supporting bands and loud crowds shouting your name from kilometres far. no matter what not tomatoes and miscellaneous will be thrown at me. no matter a wave of rude, or a board-hard critics that i shall receive, this girl will stand from down fall, to the eternal rain of Sun.

Summer Song

The sun is on my side; I see you with a tan, waving to me
I’ve got high hopes; I want to plunge into the season we promised to spend together, like a mermaid

There are sunflowers blooming by the corner of the school building; I can’t keep blushing, it’s dorky
I love you so much that I want to scream out to the blue sky now

Summer’s coming, so let’s go to the beach
Some days I stop for a bit and hesitate, but

In these low days I’ll get back those days, and I’ll see you and we’ll smile
And the summer holidays will begin, lan la lan la

When I look at your back as you run off, I see a feeling that’s not a lie
Beyond your T-shirt something sparkles, like magic

The sound of the fireworks drowns out your words and they’re carried away on the night wind
I can’t catch what you’re talking about, but I think I know

Ah long long long time, I’ve been waiting and longing
Youth is just a little cruel, isn’t it?

In these low days I’ll get back those days, and I’ll see you and we’ll smile
And the summer holidays will begin, lan la lan la

We sat on a sand dune together, worrying about time
We listened to the waves, unable to make any promises

Sometime we’ll be nostalgic for these days, I know it
We can’t rely on a future written in the sand

In these low days I’ll get back those days, and I’ll see you and we’ll smile

“It’s a bright red blue”

Summer’s coming so I came to the beach
I don’t want to forget that rainbow sky

In these low days I’ll get back those days, and I’ll see you and we’ll smile
And the summer holidays will begin, lan la lan la

Summer Song Romaji

Taiyou ga mikata suru hi ni yaketa kimi ga te wo furu kara
Kitai shiten da yakusoku no kisetsu ni tobikomu ningyo mitai ni

Kousha no sumi ni himawari ga saku terete bakari ja kakko warui ne
Aozora ni ima sakebitai hodo kimi wo omotteru

Natsu ga kuru kara umi ni ikou yo
Chotto dake tachidomatte mayou hi mo aru kedo

Hekomu mainichi torimodosu hibi kimi ni atte waraiatte
Hajimaru yo natsuyasumi lan la lan la

Hashiridashita senaka ni wa uso no nai kimochi ga utsuru kara
T shatsu no mukougawa kirakira kagayaku mahou mitai da

Hanabi no oto ni kakikesareteru kimi no kotoba ga yokaze to kawaru
Kanjin na toko kikoenai kedo wakariaesou sa

Ah long long long time machikogareteta
Seishun tte hon no chotto ijiwaru da yo ne

Hekomu mainichi torimodosu hibi kimi ni atte waraiatte
Hajimaru yo natsuyasumi lan la lan la

Sunahama ni suwarikonde futari de tokei ki ni shite ita
Nami no oto kikinagara yakusoku nante dekinai mama

Natsukashiku naru itsuka kanarazu
Suna ni kaita mirai nante ate ni dekinai

Hekomu mainichi torimodosu hibi kimi ni atte waraiatte

"Makka na buruu da"

Natsu ga kuru kara umi ni kitan da
Niji ni natta ano sora wo wasuretakunai

Hekomu mainichi torimodosu hibi kimi ni atte waraiatte
Hajimaru yo natsuyasumi lan la lan la

:D

おかえり　sweet home
帰る場所 愛をありがとう

まだ平気なフリをして
悲しみの色を塗りつぶして
笑ってしまうんです
信じることの大切さ　わかってるのに
いざという時　疑ってしまうんです

空っぽの体　流れる時に　
浮いてしまいそうになるけど
あなたのこと　抱きしめたい
このキモチが突きをかすの

おかえり I'm home
一言で　満たされる心
おかえり　sweet home
帰る場所 愛をありがとう sweet home

自分のことばかりを考える
大人はずるいんだと思っていたんです
でも必死で帰ることを 叫んでる人
もいるんだと やっと知ったんです

当たり 前の 幸せなんか　
この世界に一つもない
あなたのため　そう思えた
このキモチが突きをかすの

おかえり　I'm home
スピードが加速してく毎日
おかえり sweet home
変わらない　ずっとある景色 sweet home

探して　なくした　
心の傷が　立ち向かう強さに変われたのは
｢おかえり｣があったから

おかえり　I'm home
一言で　満たされる心
おかえり sweet home
帰る場所　愛をありがとう

おかえり　I'm home
大丈夫　あなたがいるから
おかえり sweet home
待っててね　もうすぐ着くから sweet home

Here It Mumble

its a wonder to me how some people would just make comments and their opinion about this matter. but honey, if you think about it, you have had said those magics to someone, yet making such negative impressions. one kind of confusion. i'm just in a mood to blog right now, no offence taken or received alright. there exist a place called Earth, where you find people in such split ways nor personalities. this comes to their heart. everyone has their pros and cons whatsoever. i dont even have to say this but heck it, this stands neutral as common knowledge. our priority is our own life, you get it straight, love your own, care your own, take control of your mind, plan out your days, but dont expect it to be the way you planned it to be. Its of course, His agreement if the project/subject succeeds. to have such ideas about a thing. observe it rightly. perhaps too much of exposure towards city life, or i dont know, somehow, your point of view is just practical. believe in what must be done and take control of it. i believe in changes that can be made starts with one beating heart of will. we do not have time to waste in observing negativity, lets just use gold for all benefit. people seem to like faults and falses. but i'm sure, if one person starts to be good with that true heart even if its all corrupted, other citizens shall follow. hey now, its like fashion, set a trend, people will tend to like it, and the trend will finally be accepted. you want to talk about others? sure.. want to make comments? go ahead, well thats if your superhero. i'm not saying i am a superb, i meant to say that, i too am human, not different from any of you, just living here trying to sort the right things, believing in impossibilities. making world a better place. that starts with love. what is love then? oh its too long towards definition. you'll figure it out. even at a 100 years of active ageing, with botox bottle beside you old hags tablelamps. (;D) and dear my fox mouth, to say about this, and to act this act towards someone else, dear dear my foxy mouth, apply it to yourself as the baby steps.

Blessed Me with This?

right.. mom has not been around for almost a week now, another one more guilt trashing, esteem burning week and i'm through. my little siblings kept me on emotional gadget.. i dont know how that'd happen. but yeah.. i'm an emotional sucker up pucker. Everyday, my praying routine will be like Please bless this good life of mine, help me through this phases, and empty my sin pockets. but since mom gone for umrah, i'm like 'God, bless me the patience of a Mother'. i'm super serious. this little siblings, these two headed mischievoir Dragons has really burn my nerve cells. there aint no getting on my last nerve anymore, they reached the bottom of it all. completa nada ese! Aho, honto desu! i usualy just scream at them using the highest note til i screeched that the front neighbour throw an apple at my head. (yeah -.- thats how i got apple supplies, if thats what you wanna ask bimbo) but no, this time, my brain overpowered me, like this hand really wanted to slap sometimes but it just froze right there. cause i was thinking, mums not around for them to sulk around. poor little babies. for a moment i felt like i'm a mother. but hey now, thats just 1% of mother hardships, bless my mother for taking care of 6 such devious kids.. including me, okay i admit. :D and i cry now and then, wondering at night when i go up to the master bedroom, 'll find mom sleeping with her housewife clothes on, but nah, she's not there :,( i miss you momma. Tottemo suki dai, Oka-sama. i cant live without you! yeah life, had an asthma attack, didnt go for school, missed my girls buka puasa outing!, and all terawih and stuff. i hate you bad bacterias! go away you stupid stupid things! (your neverrr learrn!- my teacher's Quote) really man, this emotional thing is killing me. probably the pms is cmg.. Well, fire up yr horses and come quick! lets get this over with already!

I'm Not Saying Goodbye

at first when i woke up today on the 17th, i was contented (well yeah aside that i'm seriously ill until i open fast before time..) because i'll get to send mommy to the airport for her umrah. i was like the first one to shower and  get ready.. bathe my sister and all. then before we left the house, my granddaddy 'azan'ed. and grandmommy started crying while we said our prayers. Arrival at the departure was amazing, it feels good to be at the airport again, you see lots of all people crying as their loved ones depart/arrive.. you see people screaming, or couples giving last kiss(haha okay i exagerrated at the last part, there wasnt any couple doing PDA's) but yeah, some people loves airports to death, some people hates em like shit. While i myself, neutral? i do love it but sometimes i dont quite like the feeling its taking my mom away. (HEY SHE'S COMING BACK!) right.. 

then came the time, my mom's departure time was 1530, and it was like and hour before that time, she and Mak Su and Abg Ijai and friends had to go in by the waiting room one step to all aboard. so everyone salam'ed eachother. mom hugged tok and they both started crying, then mom hugged Razak, Malik, Kahar, Hakim, Humairah.. then she wander looking for something til some time mom realised she havent hugged me. Told me to be good with everyone, cook well, jaga adik and all. She was saying that with her tear melody and suddenly i popped out waters too. -.-" was planning not to cry.. but everybody was.. so wth. 

Then by the elevator, the gap between Mom and us.. dad's turn to hug mom. she was whispering so i couldnt hear anything. she was still crying though. dad kept on wearing that hold-the-heartbreak-in smile. then as she step down to the elevator Kenangan Terindah song suddenly played at the KLIA stereo, good timing -.- feeling it. down the elevator, dad said to mom 'Come Back To Us, yeah'. 'InsyaAllah' mom replied him. i can sense the meaning was deep. i turned to look at dad, the first time i witnessed his heartbreaking + hopeful expression, i was screaming tears inside. Watching mom entering the check in for afar, hakim and humairah cried out sadly, calling mom again and again. Mom was out of sight, i carried Humairah in my arms.. and head to the fast tear wipe room, the toilet. then we got in the car, head to the cargo department, hoping we could see mom fly off from there :P now i'm like taking over her part at home and family, for my little siblings and everybody else. I havent practice cooking! i better go and get a rev start! 

everyones being strong for her now, the best we could do for her. 

we love you mother.

forever and ever babe.

See You Soon, Mother

she walked out right through there
hakim and humairah cries

what? XD


breaking off the tension

Wonderation

some times i escape from my head
wondering away of things..
do you think about me still? like i've always thought about you?
at night before i sleep.. had a migraine.. mixing every memories that stirred up
did i took the right step, did i made the right decision..
of the intention to forget and move on?
must i stay this way
alone as i am
nothing to bother
alone?

'dont seem to know what your heart is for

i'm all out of faith
this is how i feel
i'm wide awake and i can see the
perfect sky is torn

theres just so many things
that i cant touch i'm torn'

Come Undone

its my life youre playing about
the lie that assassinated this blood
care you not of my questions
unchained, devote not, after all the battles
never did you open your eyes even once?
what have i done to you
that placed you at a content of losses
i only felt the sweetness of every morning
i only understand the rain that sings
saw you as waters
saw you as my sword
life without this piece
living with the unliving
that concieve your own self
nothing left.
life losts its meaning.. without another to..?
its left as question.
honour this waiting ventriloquist
for she has been tortured waiting
no life as only she controls
the dummy without love,
as been given to grow
only it tumbles down
with rough wings.
may my life they will call

A gOOd Fat Burn

rehearsal was great, except i missed alfin, havent seen him in along time. Inka brought me cookies!!! still it doesnt top brownies my sistah. yes girl it has sugar written all over it, gave me diabetes, REALLY! the playboy shape is really cute, suits me. AHAHA. yeah and a good rehearsal plus all sugar non free cookies, whats the use of exercise?? equals to more fat gain. ahahah. BUT thanks inka i really enjoyed every taste that stimulated. (what a way to say thanks, cant i b anymore lamer?) after finished rhrsal, me and qis walked to aunty farah's hse, we were talking about Wonder Girls and Girls Generation.. debating of which is better. we ended up saying GG is way better. (in a bet, bet eachother to say the word Way from clubhse til aunty farah's place) crazy really. the neighbours were staring. ^.^ yeah, after that went to Curve, got raya shoes! blair-like stilettos! the heels are like 4 inches i think. i'm drooling over it right now. i'm going to sleep with it beside my pillow like my dad (yeah he does that when he was young) XD i'm sorry for spilling daddy!...

can you believe it finals are damn near. I'm not even one bit of ready!!! opening books now, well make that promise change to tomorrow ;c

Fade Not Memories

Interview Continuum

well it was alright, i was being paranoid on the previous post, the interview was just an assignment for med students, they came by my house talked and answered Q's. told them the basic stuff about me and all. it was for practice to improvise their communication skills with patients. -.-" yes i'm a patient. they are Pei Chee, Asnida and Hakem. on 2nd year for the med course. started off pretty nervous not me, but them. Surprisingly i was really laid back. so Hakem complimented me for being positive. AHAHAHA what a revolver. me? positivomente? nada! Probably cause it was an interview so suddenly my brain took over me. I dont even remember what i answered. XD. and in the morning that day i was having a bad fever, my body was stuck to my Sturgess husband-bed, told mom i couldnt do the interview but.. the interview turned alright. Hakem said again, 'we had what we came for, thanks' :D wuuuuweee. so yeah. according to the contract, i'll have to coorperate with them forthe  5 years to come. meet a luck i'll live that long. 

Sturgess not well today. No poem will be published. thank you.

Interview with The Med Students

so i went to doctors appointment for a check up, after finshd consulting discussions, at the end my cousin in law doctor asks me if a few students would like to work on me, lika an interview.. and whAT?? am i a star for being sick, you can get famous for that? what a sick world.. -.-"

Glued Again, Superglued

hey hey hey there my ladies, you cant be a one alone, to swallow the pain on your own, two is still a couple, once break wont come one again as strong, three will face an isolation, four is just not perfect, five is great but there'll be those rocky roads, six wont be good for hot gossips, seven a step towards the best of course the step is eight. 

yes loyals, i love them. eight we are, inseperable. if just one knock to kick one out, the others of us will definitely feel incomplete. i've never had such beautiful people in my life. of course there are other people who are very beautiful but these seven different people that came tumbling in my life with various ways, somehow they pop up in my chapters and became the important part of it all. There were alot of laughters, tears, and vomits XD but yeah. each one of them have interesting characters, both in positivity or negativity. no matter which hole they fall into, i definitely embrace them as much as i could. i love you girls :)

Its Karma for Belsey

have always criticized someone so badly, 'look what a jerk he was to me!',, 'goodness, you have a giant tadmole!', 'i;m sorry you only conversate with money',''i will never do that to anyone"

i know i have. i'm sure everyone has. if you think not, then i am sorry. well yeah. have been said, being a stuck up jerk is one thing to avoid, not even in girls nature to even feel for one clip of second, but think it over my loyals.. you have been a jerk too, so had i. i played many hearts, indulged in every advantages, being the dark side for a minute or two.
but still i dont know my real intentions. but i dont understand why i kept on judging others.. who the hell am i? what makes myself think of my own so highly to even hurt the atomic inch of them, no, no rights at all. Theres no such thing as that in the Law Book. yeah bimbo go check it out.
and now. here i am, of course Miss Fate, i'm facing my consequences. I've learnt from my karma. i was stupid, and i hope stupidity doesnt return to its Holy Brain again. or was it to the heart? i dont know. Well, i'm Belsey, maybe am, maybe not, you dnt know, got no proof honey. Goodbye now.

The Painkiller

he lights me up ^.^

Major Unecessary

someone bring a circus! or get her manga! or get her a perfect teppanyaki! make that a plus delicious!

STRESS MAN! get outa my life, firstly, yeah my allergies are getting worse, how thankful am i? gosh my nigga. next, i didnt puasa today, why???? the allergy, the darn freaking virus. (i didnt meant to say freaking if it wasnt for this peaceful month) how in loss i am. moving on, missed school, wasted whole day on bed. Being nursed and fed, call that luxury?? no! gained more unecessary fats! we gotta work, work to work this out. -.-" oukay that was not on purpose, but yeah im lookin forward to HSM3.   

and i cant eat that much, barely eating well, lip injury. at this point with all this stuff i figured out God really loves me. yea yea i know, being self centered right now.. bad siti. Youre sleeping outside tonight. Mrs Sturgess.. out!

Playing Imaginations

yeah it is entertaining, get yr heart beats faster than men's normal pace, get butterflies in yr stomache, and all that jazz but its all fake..

i hate but i love it, yes thanks Stacie Orrico i finally understand what you meant. i wish i could stop dreaming, but no, i dont think i'll ever will. People always want what they cant have right, so i thought it wont apply to me, but if i think it over, my life.. it does. Just that i didnt i cant have it before i tried. But yes, i'm not suppose to 'have' it, it comes naturally.. the feeling..

this is not the time for it? but some 20++ says it is the best time, some says definitely not the time. i'm just plain confused!! mama mia, utilizar la entrada??! i guess i should just stand by the walls and watch from afar. that be happiest... -.-

so then she sigh and sigh and sigh, till out of breath that surrounds,
Mrs Sturgess <3

Nobody Came For Me

While the downpour clashes to the ground
as the breaking stretches it forms to sound
and the snorter vehicles finds their way
Pollutes the music haven everyday

There at the lonely bus stand i sat
on the eerie bench thats flat
Thinking whats mischief at home
worrying the mights and what ifs when i'm gone

The silver puddle on the quiet ground
Enlightens tis sorrow heart with an inch
Slowly replaces a calm line by this frown
Interrogates the fright whom ablazed a flint

A girl sitting all alone
Hoping none to forget those weak bones
when and where are they

Happy thoughts flow to her from her prayer
Realising the bitter will get the sweet and better
As still then she counts the engines pass by
Yet is now flowing down her velvet cheeks, a cry.

Its My Christmas Present

<3 oh it is love. Jim Sturgess

21

jim sturgess, since when he got so steamed up?? oh i dont know but i'm in love!! :)

well, heres the catch about me currently, feelling undecisive, this choice of life is pretty biggo dungo but i'm like trapped in one image. my motive = none :S . not that there isnt any. just tht, nthgs coming to conclusion, love. oh uh, sigh.
well, theres this dikir barat thing, our class put up with an okay work so i guess the result was okay too. maybe just an inch better than okay. we got fourth place out of 6. and after that went for ict class but teacher wasnt in.. so we took pictures of ourselves in baju melayu and became male models. XD wth right..
i went to hospital again today ( wow, unexpected huh? right -.-) something wrong with my lips, it bleed the other day. ugh, i sound emo'ish but its true, mairah's head bang'ed my lips then it bleeds, it hurt so bad, i couldnt move. so after a few days it looked horridible so i went for a check up. nothg serious though. thank god, survived a month without surgery!!
so yeah, imma go to sleep again, its evening.. tired of laughters and psycho pals with sweet retarded brains. and too, PE cause i did that step up step down thing, during puasa.. i guess she wants to kill me or something? huh. but it kinda burned and toned myself, so yeah thankful for today. Jim Sturgess? if you're out there, i really need to talk to you :) oh yeah, it is about us. and i asked my parents already, we have their blessings.

About Everything

and *beep beep* there goes my phone with little sized text once you push the button of enter, and the doom will occur if you reply. wth am i rubbishin abt? i dnt knw either. well fasting days havent been very well, the days when i ganti puasa was just fine, i could do sports! bt this time, sleep every evening -.- my god, this isnt helping to get rid of some pounds in this marshmellow figure. I dnt know why i'm blogging so lazily but i just had to. OH and i'm facing a ridiculous dilemmas. Sure youd guess what abt. theres 1 which said wanted to wait but nothings happening anyway, theres 2 which things have settled but i dont feel that eased, theres 3 which only wanted company but too giving me wrong ideas.
and yeah its a bad day for me, Daniel Powter's philosophy about it aint doing so good. Guess i cant keep on landing on musics all the time.
and theres this person, i'm just gonna pray for her calmness to return, she's been looking unwell and it seems like she's putting up a give up charisma. M you better get things alright, or, i'm sure sooner or later everythings gonna be fine. i miss yr awful sarcasm. i miss everyone

i dnt know what to type anymore. Hence i shall go to my handsome looking bed,
i love you